Our room was bitter cold and no manner of warmth from the fireplace could chase away the chill, so snuggling deep into the pillows on the antique canopy bed was just the ticket. The moaning from the hallways really helped my husband get to sleep in the absence of his white noise generator.
Mom lifted her arms and all the cutlery leapt from the drawers. A few stray forks impaled the zucchini she’d been slicing before the ruckus began.
It crawled out of its own pan on nine legs
What can you do but scramble for shore?
Her trailer looked abandoned, and some people said she didn’t exist at all (particularly when they couldn’t find her in the winter; Jeffers Wilkerson said she must…… Read more “The Snake Woman of Bismark”
Old toasters, broken Rolex watches, reclaimed pallets, Prada bags shredded by biting winds and hail storms, cracked cell phone casings, hamster cages, Ed Hardy shirts hung up…… Read more “The Things in Ozymandias’ Shack”
To the apocalypse, she took with her an oversized beach towel, heavy and orange, bought for ten dollars at a discount bulk supplier before the starving rioters…… Read more “To the Apocalypse, she took”
Dr. Melisandra Kalamaras made her name with a series of cultural criticism on the vengeful ghost phenomenon, writing at one point in the Journal of Relativistic Physics…… Read more “She had a Theory of Ghosts”
The things that killed the world were (in no order of appearance): machine learning, Facebook ads, floods, water shortages, lobbyists, the flu, Stevia, the breakdown of civil…… Read more “Apocalypse Accounting”
Do yoga every day. Finish a new book every week. Eat more Rutabagas. Develop an additional layer of ascularized adipose tissue and a fine, pearlescent covering of…… Read more “New Year’s Resolutions 2018”
One night, for some bizarre reason, my kid wanted to sleep on the couch. I didn’t want to tell him that his dad and I needed the couch…… Read more “The Ghost with No Place to Sit”
The doctors say there’s an operation, one that can make the land give up its corn and cabbages, and he thinks about it strongly because it’s been…… Read more “What the Garden Wants”