no goblins will glare out of dark cellar shadows because/
we all know, for quite certain, that monsters aren’t real.
Author: Lorna Dickson Keach
You Have Been Visited by the Weasel of Sorrows
I will return: Monday, Tuesday, Friday. Blank checkboxes sit beside each day’s name.
That Thing Standing Behind You
There’s so little to eat, the icebox is empty
Is it too much to ask to dine with a friend?
The Snuggly Dead
Arturo’s body was never found, and that was all well and good because after getting chased around by that chainsaw-wielding maniac, he could have really used a break.
There’s a Big Demon Alligator Sitting on the Lawn
And the neighbors glared at you, of course, because they think it’s your fault.
Skulls, Skulls, Skulls!
She wandered for what seemed like forever, picking through the racks of skull skulptures and skull wine holders, skull key chains, skull mandolins, skull chaise lounges, skull guillotines, skull pendulums, skull jack-in-the-boxes.
“Great, but Too Many Floating Eyeballs”
Our room was bitter cold and no manner of warmth from the fireplace could chase away the chill, so snuggling deep into the pillows on the antique canopy bed was just the ticket. The moaning from the hallways really helped my husband get to sleep in the absence of his white noise generator.
Dinner in the Hands of an Angry God
Mom lifted her arms and all the cutlery leapt from the drawers. A few stray forks impaled the zucchini she’d been slicing before the ruckus began.
A Muffin For Distant Cosmic Shores
It crawled out of its own pan on nine legs
That Fish is Going to Eat You
What can you do but scramble for shore?
The Snake Woman of Bismark
Her trailer looked abandoned, and some people said she didn’t exist at all (particularly when they couldn’t find her in the winter; Jeffers Wilkerson said she must…… Read more “The Snake Woman of Bismark”
The Things in Ozymandias’ Shack
Old toasters, broken Rolex watches, reclaimed pallets, Prada bags shredded by biting winds and hail storms, cracked cell phone casings, hamster cages, Ed Hardy shirts hung up…… Read more “The Things in Ozymandias’ Shack”